Friday, December 31, 2010


I took this photo almost a year ago.  When I took it I had the intentions of posting about my Grandpa, thinking then, our time with him here on Earth would be precious.  I started the post a number of times, trying to capture all the memories and stories he told us.  I never could find the right format I wanted to lay the story out in.  Now, I just want the words down somewhere, somehow, no matter how jumbled or out of order they may be.  And so, that's the way the posts about Grandpa Snaz, Robert, Bob, Bobby will be, random thoughts, random everything.

Yesterday, December 30 my phone rang at 8:50 AM, I thought it was probably my friend Susan.  {We like to catch up in the morning if we can.}  Instead, it was my Dad, when he calls I mostly worry.  My Dad has been at Grandpa's side during this horrible health journey.  He sleeps at the hospital, drives him to his appointments, knows where he's been and what the road ahead might bring.  

"How's is going Dad?" 
"Not good, Grandpa is having a heart attack.  He's in the emergency room".
"Should I come?"
"I think so"
That's bad.  My Dad hasn't ever told me to come.  I also know that the only way he would tell me to come is if he thinks it could be the last time I would be able to come

I made it to my hometown by 2:15 PM, driving through rain and then snow with freezing rain for a base.  Praise God for my safe arrival and thanks to all who prayed. 

Grandpa is small in the hospital bed, curled up even smaller, sleeping finally.  Upon awaking he immediately knew who I was, despite all the morphine.  And for the rest of the day he was in and out of sleep or a heavily drugged state all of which was good at this point as the night prior and morning were filled with a pain like no other.

In talking with him this morning he said he has nurses with him at his assisted living residence all through the night prior.  Then finally at about 7:00 AM he said he couldn't handle it any longer and needed to go in.  They brought him via ambulance.  The doctor today confirmed he had a "big heart attack"  Most likely still is.

Here's the rundown:

  • He is in heart failure, kidney failure. 
  • Had a CT scan yesterday without contrast {contrast would wipe out his kidney function completely}.   
  • The CT scan showed fluid in his left (?) lung, enlarged heart with possible fluid surrounding it.
  • At this time he is unable to have the fluid drained and for many reasons most likely will not have it drained.
  • He was unable to void but a ultrasound showed urine in his bladder, therefor a catheter was put in this morning.
  • He was taken off morphine about 9:00 PM last night as his breathing became too shallow.
  • He was off the morphine last evening and remained without pain all evening.  This morning the pain in his right arm became too intense, therefor,
  • He was given nitroglycerin this morning and a dose of morphine rather than a drip, as with the drip his breathing became too shallow
  • This AM nitroglycerin tablets were not effective and is now on a nitro drip that has been upped three times in the last hour. 
  • He currently is not feeling pain and resting
  • He will have a blood transfusion as soon as the blood can be matched {I thought this was as simple as getting some from a cabinet.  He's been waiting for the labs to find a match for almost 2.5 hours.}  Note to self:  donate blood
  • More than likely he is still having a heart attack from yesterday that is being pain managed through meds
He is scared.  He is scared.  He is scared.

We are sad.

I spent the night with him here at the hospital and hope to be able to spend a few more days before returning home to my family.  I pray that I will be able to come back soon. 

Would you please keep him in your prayers?  Thank you and God Bless.

5 Sweet Comments:

  1. The dB familyDec 31, 2010 10:31 AM

    Lifting you all up in prayer!

  2. CMDec 31, 2010 03:13 PM
    Praying for your Grandpa and your family. {{hugs}}
  3. Heidi BrachleDec 31, 2010 06:26 PM
    Tina, this all sounds painfully and much too recently familiar. I pray that for your Grandpa and your family the outcome will be different. Praying for strength and grace, my friend.
  4. Heidi BrachleDec 31, 2010 06:28 PM
    This comment has been removed by the author.
  5. KateJan 1, 2011 10:30 AM
    I've been keeping your grandfather in my prayers. Your love for him is evident and I am sure he is deeply comforted by your presence.
    Please keep us updated.

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